VALENTINE + ONLINE = VALONLINE

...So am chatting with a friend and she was like:

"My DATE hasn't arrived. Am still waiting for him"

"Where did he go to and why would he keep you waiting on such a beautiful day?" 

"Well, I haven't got the slightest idea where he would be".

I asked her to call but she said the lines she tried were not connecting. I was mad at this guy who was keeping a pretty lady waiting.

Angrily, I asked in Pidgin English: "Who be this guy sef!??"

" I don't know ooo. I just ordered a DATE." 

"You what?!"

"You know... Same way you order a phone"

"What!!?"

"Yea"

"That's Funny." "You order DATE online?!" "na phone?" I asked in Pidgin English.

She said she chose to have an e-date because she didn't trust the guys around. 

"They could be fake, you know?"

Well, she said it was KONGA.com o! But her worries are that they may not deliver today.

"The problem is if they deliver tomorrow, chicken go don FINISH"

"So why didn't  you use Jumia?"

"Ah! Jumia whey dey fall person hand every time?! I don stop to dey trust those guys oo"

I sympathized with her and ask her to call CUSTOMER CARE to find out if they had shipped her date....

HAPPY VALENTINE PEEPS!!

OR

HAPPY VAL-ONLINE!!